And they lived happily ever after?

The other day, I was talking to a friend. She was complaining about her relationship - the difficulties of a long distance relationship, the misunderstandings and the ever increasing gaps in expectations and achievements. I just listeneedd to it all without really venturing with any opinion or advice. Not that she needed advice - over the years, I have understood that when women talk, they generally don't look forward to advice; it's enough for most of them to have someone to listen to it all. It's very easy to be friends, but once you cross that line and go the next step, most people would agree that suddenly the equations change. The same people who were so much fun as friends, suddenly become responsibilities - never easy to please, always ready to pick on your shortcomings & sometimes extremely difficult to understand. Maybe, I'm only giving the darker side; sometimes it turns out beautiful as well, with easier communication and understanding. And thats how it should turn out, since it's the same person - the friend who understood you so well, that you chose to spend your life with him/her.

But then, most of the times once you start sharing your life with a person, you start having extremely huge expectations from the person. During your friendship - the issues you used to laugh at and erase from your mind, suddenly the very same issues turn out to be the basic reasons, you start getting angry. You forget that, you were able to have a great frienship with the person, just because you never had hang-ups or problems with your partner's way of life - you might have actually adored them and fallen in love with them.

Once you start thinking that your partner should adopt the way of life you choose, it turns ugly, since two people might have completely different outlooks towards life - and even the outlook might keep changing over the years. Most people believe that their partner should always treat them as special, but is it necessary? Why is it necessary? Weren't the days of friendship when you were not treated so "specially", much better? And then there are others who insist that their partner shouldn't have a separate life other than the one with them. Why? Isn't it better that both people have their own life and share those moments with each other, rather than completely fuse their life together - alwasy doing the same things together.

Maybe it's fun for some, but would definitely take away the independence of others.

It would be so much happier for both the members in a relationship to accept the other person's view and if not in agreement, just mention it, rather than having expected something and having your expectationos blown off. But I guess, these things will never change and there will always be complaints about partners. Guess thats how life stays interesting to people.